I Felt Sorry For Him Until...

So my fabulous husband, you know -the one who was recently very sick and just broke his arm? -has like, a million jobs.  He works for half a million orchestras in the state of Indiana, some in Pennsylvania, teaches in PA, AND plays for Pittsburgh Opera, on top of being a campus bus supervisor for IU.  So the guy has a crazy schedule, yeah?  Well this hilarious story is a product of his schedule!  Enjoy!  :)


So I'm sleeping really terribly (not a trend I am a fan of), and I'm finally all taco-ed up in the blankets.  Do you know what taco-ing the blankets is?  Ok -side explanation.

The bed taco: when you are sleeping by yourself and are always so bloody cold, you lay on your back, and turn allll the way to one side and tuck the covers underneath you.  Then, you repeat on the other side, making yourself into a nice little taco.  I am frequently known as the "Briana taco" at our house.  IT'S AMAZING and WILL change your life.

Ahem, anyway....

I'm finally somewhat asleep, all taco-ed up, when all of a sudden, *WHAP*!!!  I have have been smacked in the head by the guilt-causing-cast-of-doom (you read that right.  This is no normal cast!!!).  The cast that is attached to the husband, who is coming in from a late night bus shift...at 1:45am.  It's not enough that I wake up every morning clutching it all white knuckled out of guilt -like I pushed the fates juuuust a tad too far, and they decided that in order to get him to see a doc for his cold, they had to break his wrist.  You know what I'm sayin'?  So I've just been brained by the cast....

Uhm -OUCH!  Bloody, gosh darn OUCH!

I mean -sure, it may be dark, but GEEZUS!  Wife sleeping!  I was feeling sorry for the guy, especially about hating on his being sick and stuff, until he just busted into the bed like a bull in a china shop, waving his cast around like mad man, hitting me on the head.  This is NOT a Bunny-Foo-Foo/Field Mice situation.  No fairy's going to come down from Fairy Land and save me from this maniac.  What am I to do?

What does a faithful, somewhat recently unsympathetic wife to do?  What to do....

Here are the choices that I came up with at 1:45am:
First: punch him back?  Not wise -I don't want to hurt his feelings...again, you know...and he is wearing a fiberglass cast.... PASS!
Second: give him my absolutely perfected death stare?  No...that just makes him giggle, darn him.
Third: mumble some profanities and roll back over?  YES!  It is never too early for a well mumbled, unintelligible curse or two.

So after sticking it to him, (haha...) I finally decide to lay back down, grumble about being un-taco-ed and get back to sleeping.  My shift only starts at 5:30 in the morning....

I wish I could tell you that he got the memo, but while I was drifting back to the glorious bliss of being taco-ed, he turned the light on.  At 1:45am.

Don't worry.  He's still alive.  Good thing he has that cast on his wrist.....


Happy Friday!  :)