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January 16, 2012

The "Perfect" Friend



{Warning -this sounds a little looney-tunes, but if you read it with sarcasm, you'll get my drift!  ;)  }

Who has one?  C'mon -raise your hand.  I TOTALLY know that you do...and I bet she makes you crazy?  Mine sure does!  Did yours send out a Christmas card?  Are you shaking your head?  Well -if she didn't, keep reading.  I'll share my "perfect" friend with you, and hopefully some laughs, too!

So here's what you already know:
First: I'm coming off of full time student status, the husband is too -Christmas cards were sent AFTER Christmas!
Second: I can't ever manage to get anything done (especially on time...)
Third: I can't stand people who are perfect on the outside -there's a bigger, undiscovered crack on the inside (if you didn't know this, you do now.  Apply directly...)!
Fourth (OK -you didn't know this one, but it's true): She's not a perfect friend.  She considers herself too busy to even respond to a text message (they're not weird or anything!  I PROMISE.  They say things like, "hey!  Just thinking of you!  Hope you're well"  You'd respond to that, RIGHT???)

So -I get a Christmas card from a college friend.  Actually, she used to be more than just a friend, but that's a different story.  I open up the card, really excited!  She hasn't bothered to write/call/text back, so getting a Christmas card was VERY exciting.  So I open it and see six pictures of her and her husband smiling back at me.  I start to fume....

These aren't just ANY pictures -these are PERFECT pictures.  WHO DOES THAT???  They're staged -lighting is perfect -their clothes match -and they're in idillic places.  I REPEAT -WHO DOES THAT?  I seriously can't manage to get myself put together, let along arrange to have my picture taken perfectly AT LEAST six times.

Anyway.

So I look over at my husband, who's staring at me (probably afraid for his personal safety, at this moment in time...), and say, "don't judge me!" as I rip the card into as many little pieces as I possibly can.  HA!  This perfect little photo Christmas card, with a bunch of little smiling faces is now floating through the air back down towards my grinning face.

A girl can only handle so much, you know?

So as I'm prancing around the dining room, shuffling around the pieces of this perfect little photo card, I start to feel a little guilty.  The card stock was really nice -I could have reused it!!!  I mean, this girl is NEVER going to know that I got some joy out of ripping up a little piece of "perfect", right?  It's not like I'm gonna call her (and leave a message like I would normally have), and say, "hey!  So thanks for the card, I ripped it up and danced on it.  Yeah -what's that?  Well...I did it because it made me feel better."

NOT GONNA' HAPPEN!

So -don't give my secret away, ok?  Not that she'll ever find my blog, call me back, or anything....  It can be our little world wide web secret!  ;)

HAPPY MONDAYYYY!!!!!

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